The Father Life

Plumb Tired

By Ben Murphy, TheFatherLife.com

I'm worn out. Lately, there are days that life feels like a version of Alexander and the Terrible Horrible No Good Very Bad Day–but a depressing, grown-up version. I've had a sinus infection for over a week. The kids are healthy now but were sick for over a month. One of our cars broke down the other day. Professional life is busier (both good and bad) than ever and it's not slowing down. Our baby is teething which makes for fantastic sleep at night. I'm watching a close friend go through a potential divorce... Oh yeah, I have a wife and a family too with all the responsibilities that entails...

Goodness! Is this what I signed up for?

Of course it is.

And I'm absolutely certain I'm not alone in this boat. I get the sense that most of us are feeling a bit weary these days. And, frankly, I don't really have a lot to legitimately complain about; after all, I still have a job, a house, a loving family. Things could be far, far worse. Many of you reading this recently lost a job and there's just no way around the hardship that represents. Many of you reading this are trying to figure out how to pay for next week's groceries or how to make the next mortgage payment. It really is a bad time for a lot of families right now.

So I'm writing this month to encourage all of us to hang in there and to remind you that you're not the only one who gets exhausted sometimes. We all do. Guess what? Life is really just overwhelming sometimes. It's not you, it's reality. It's just that as fathers and as men I think we often feel like less of a man if we admit to this. I think that before we became parents most of us felt that 5 or 15 years down the road we'd have the house and the kids and... the answers. But life is almost always not what we expect it to be, and the reality is that we really are kind of out there on our own without much of a net. And that can be scary; and that's ok. We're all there.

But that–all the insanity and weariness and questions–is really what makes the good times and the triumphs that much more meaningful. It's what makes the time with our kids that much more rewarding. It's what makes the time with our spouses that much more valuable. So savor each and every one of those moments no matter what is going on in your life and the world around you. May each of us not take what we have for granted. Let's not be afraid to hit each other up for advice. And may we, out of gratitude, continue to do the best we with what we've been given.

Ben Murphy is the Founder of TheFatherLife.com, a Men's Magazine for Dads. He lives in upstate New York with his wife and three kids.